Most guys would jump at the chance to spank their girlfriends especially if they have been asked. But not all guys like this, if your boyfriend is shy, timid, submissive, or not confident it might be hard for him to do that.
So ask yourself, is my boyfriend dominant or is my boyfriend submissive, you want to be able to convince him to do this, but for him to say yes you need to look at 11 things that you can do to get your boyfriend to spank you.
I Want My Boyfriend To Spank Me (13 Ways To Convince Him)
If you want your boyfriend to spank you, then you must speak to him and tell him what you want, don’t feel shy or embarrassed. Show him examples of how to lightly spank you and make it fun for the both of you, Should he say no, you need to respect his boundaries.
Bring it up at a good time
Bringing it up when the two of you are on your way to work or school is not going to help, if anything it will catch him off guard and he might say no. If spanking you is something that he has never done, don’t bring this up when you are making love.
It works best if you tell him “ Baby, I was thinking, I enjoy being with you and I love it when we make love, I would like it if you would spank me just a little” during a neural time of day.
Respect his NO
Suppose you ask him and he says No, as much as this will hurt your feelings respect the fact that he doesn’t want to do it. Him telling you No is his way of asserting his boundaries and you need to be okay with that.
Show him examples
It will work in your favor if you show a few examples so that it doesn’t look like you got the idea out of space. Tell him to keep an open mind and say something like “Baby I saw this on this website, what do you think” or “ I was reading about ways that couples can spice up their bedroom and I came across spanking and it made me think that we could try it, here see this”.
Open it up
You can’t be the only one who has kinks your boyfriend has things that he wants you to try but is too shy to tell you. So open it up and ask him what he would like, you might find that he wants you to be more aggressive in bed or he might want you to dress sexier so add a little flavor to your bedroom.
Dont feel embarrassed
He is your boyfriend and is supposed to be a source of safety and comfort so do not feel ashamed or embarrassed this is what you want and hope to implement in your relationship and might or might not give the both of you pleasure. It’s still worth trying so don’t be shy, scared, or embarrassed to tell him you want him to spank you.
Take it slow
Ok darling if he agrees to this you have to know when to take this slowly, he might not like a lot of things added. If you want to do more things let him get used to spanking you first then introduce things like adult toys or adult movies. Don’t ask him to spank you today and tomorrow you ask him to wear high heels because it will turn you on, easy does it, pace yourself.
Give and take
He deserves to be spoilt and you have to let him know how much you appreciate him, but don’t go overboard after he agrees to spank you and you both have a great night look into buying him something nice.
Men love gifts I suggest that you buy a gift basket for him. Lots of online stores sell this and you can place an order, and look at terms such as boyfriend gift basket for him, relaxation gift basket for him, or spa gift basket for him.
Play it safe
Just in case he gets carried away and thinks he is Hulk Hogan from WWE wrestling in a match against John Cena and accidentally spanks you hard I suggest having a safe word that you can use.
Many couples you are into BDMS have what we call BDSM safe words, a word that is used when things get too hot and you want your partner to stop. There are plenty of words that you can say, for example, pineapple, pear, apples, and banana are a few examples
Come up with a word that you both agree on, you will use this word when he is doing it too hard.
Add other things
He might agree to lightly spanking you but if he is shy he might find it weird, you can add another element to this like blindfolding or adult roleplay to make it seem more natural. Some people find spanking out of the blue as a weird concept, so be creative.
Tell him exactly what you want
He cannot guess what and how you would like this because he is not a psychic nor can he smell what your heart desires so tell him exactly what you need him to do. It’s a lot easier to talk this through when you are honest don’t pretend or dumb down your needs.
Say to him “ Honey I would like you to spank me because the idea turns me on, it’s what I want to experience” and then give him a chance to respond.
Understand that it might be awkward
The first time we do anything in the bedroom it’s always awkward, think about the first time you and your boyfriend made love, unless you had a ton of Twill Cellars, Chardonnay 2018mixed with Smirnoff, and a touch of Junipero Gini then your first time was most likely tense. That is what happens, especially when we are intimate because we are showing our most sensitive side.
The same thing applies with spanking, he might be way in over his head so much so that he might disconnect a few times, and you might sit or lie there confused, so understand that the first time this happens might not be memorable.
Think about your needs
You are the only one who can give a straight answer to this question, so what will happen if he doesn’t want to spank you and is happy with vanilla love making Will you end the relationship if he says No, he is happy with the same missionary style that you guys do?
How important is being adventurous in the bedroom to you, if it’s that important are you willing to suppress your needs and respect his boundaries?
The danger of suppressing our most intimate needs is that it can create resentment, you can be happy with the kind of guy that he is, and he might treat you like a princess and at times treat you like a baby making you feel like the best woman in the world.
But at what cost? You may or may not cheat on him and justify it by saying that because he doesn’t like it you don’t want to force him and we know cheating is not right.
Get to your why
Darling is this a new kink you want to try once or are you trying to improve your bedroom life, you know what they say be careful what you wish for. Think about the source of this new fantasy. Some people suffer from guilt and use bedroom intimacy as a way to solve their guilt. Have you misbehaved in some way? Or is your man feminine and you feel like he needs to be more dominant? Remember don’t start something that you might not be able to handle.
In the end
The only way to get what you want is to ask for it, Remember the number one rule of lovemaking: To make each other feel loved and safe. Establish a safe word and have some fun… Good luck.