A controlling boyfriend might be cute in the beginning but that gets tired very fast. When a guy treats you like a baby it can leave you confused because on the one hand, it’s all sweet and you love it but on the other, he may come off as acting like you cannot make tough decisions so which one is? Some women might not see this as cute a majority of modern women might even say this is a sign of disrespect.
One of the best ways to determine if this behavior is good is to think if you told your mother that your boyfriend treats you like a baby and detailed his behavior, what do you think she would say? “Wow, my daughter’s boyfriend is controlling”.
But before you do that, read the story submitted by one of our readers in Atlanta and then have a look at why he treats you like a baby, and try some of the solutions that we have, you will love the very last one.
Why does my boyfriend treat me like a baby?
“Dear Her Darling life, I have been dating my boyfriend for two years and while everything has been great, I feel like he treats me like a baby. We have decided to move in together and so far he has been making all the decisions about where we will live. He even wants to buy the house even though I make my own money. I feel like he treats me like I am an immature gf, I love the fact that I have an overprotective boyfriend but with buying a house I feel like I should also contribute. I love him and he is great but I feel like he treats me like a baby too much. Is there something wrong or am I overacting?”– Carla Atlanta
8 Reasons why your boyfriend treats you like a baby
Your boyfriend treats you like a baby for two reasons the first reason is that you let him make the decisions in the relationship and you have done this for a long time that he feels he needs to take control by babying you, the second reason could be that treating you like a baby is his way of showing you how much he loves, cares, adores and respects you.
He is overprotective
Overprotective boyfriends feel the need to baby us at times and this might be the case, as the male your boyfriend feels he must protect you physically, emotionally, and mentally, and this can come off as treating you like a baby.
You act like a baby
Tell the truth, acting like a baby feels so good at times right? I mean who doesn’t want to be spoiled, pampered, and well, babied? Maybe you acted like a baby way too much and he might say to himself “My girlfriend wants to be treated like a baby”. Acting like a baby will work for you in the beginning because the relationship is fresh it will have you walking around saying to everyone ” My boyfriend treats me like a princess and I love it” but if you overplay your baby hand it can have you doubting yourself.
He wants you dependent on him
Darling, A good tactic that narcissists use is to keep their supply. In this case, you depend on them, this will make it hard for you to do or take any decision on your own because they will program you to doubt your decision-making and let them take the lead. Everything you do at work, at home, or in your social life will revolve around him saying yes or no, that’s a narcissist right there.
He doesn’t trust you to make your own decisions
Piggybacking on the previous point, he wants you to ask him for permission to do the smallest things, even buying groceries will be depended on what food he thinks you should have, what gym you should go to, and what job you should apply for, can you see how treating you like a baby can evolve into.
He has a dominant personality
It’s a male thing, well not all males like to be overly dominant but treating you like a child sends little signals that he has a dominant personality, can you blame him? Darling, he may have had no choice but to take on this role throughout his entire life because he may have been the only male at home growing up or the types of girlfriends that he had in the past have been submissive, they might have given him authority over their lives, so we can be a little lenient here.
He thinks it is cute
He might not tell you this but he might secretly love the fact that you act childish, it gives him a sense of purpose, a role in your life that he as your boyfriend fulfills, all men including your prince charming love to come in and save the day, they find it cute and yes, it boosts their ego and self-confidence to know that they are needed, wanted and are providers.
He is a control freak
It’s all sweet when he showers you with hugs and kisses, and calls you names like a baby, but keep your eyes open, he might be trying to sneak in a control tactic, but you won’t see it in the beginning because of course, being treated like a baby feels good, but you can morph into the baby role so much that he can control you making him superior.
It is how he was raised
Yes, Darling, we are back with the cultural background links because more often than not, culture and background play a role in how your man treats you. Some cultures teach men to dismiss what their women say, you can find this type of male arrogance in different countries, dare I say, South Africa, Cambodia, and even Mexico.
It’s not your boyfriend’s fault nor should he take complete responsibility for the culture that he comes from but sometimes men from these backgrounds don’t treat women or children with respect at home or in the workplace, phew, don’t come for me.
7 Things that you must do when your boyfriend treats you like a baby
If your boyfriend treats you like a baby there are two things that you can do, first, remind him of your ability to make your own decisions and tell him to trust that you don’t need him to be dominant all the time, second you can monitor your behavior and try not to act childish or like a baby all of the time.
Make your own decisions
Make a decision Darling, It’s time to put on your big girl panties and make your own decisions, this includes, the social, financial, and mental direction of your life, no more cute baby language talk for you, take the bull by the horns and woman up.
Assert yourself
Yes, power to you this will show him how mature you are, you don’t have to overly assert yourself in every area because let’s face it it can be nice when your man takes control, so demand equal treatment in important decisions such as buying a house, car and how many children you will have.
If you cannot assert yourself in certain situations learning to trust yourself might take you a long time, remember being babied is sweet and shows that he loves you but what happens when it leaves you saying to yourself “ I don’t trust myself because my boyfriend babies me”
Think long term
Acting like a baby might work for or against you, but when it starts to work against you it will have you walking around town in a daze thinking “My boyfriend treats me like I am stupid, is this okay? because you give him too much power, it’s all about balance, in serious situations turn off your baby face, and in other situations switch it back on.
Understand the different types of treatments
There is being treated like a baby and being treated like a baby, it looks the same but darling understand the difference There are times when being treated like a baby is romantic and good, but there are times when it’s annoying and not warranted if this is a love thing then it is fine, but if he is doing it to take control then we have a problem.
Tell him to change
It’s always best to do this calmly and respectfully, don’t attack or come off as mean girl energy, we are not in a protest here you are only trying to get him to limit the times that he treats you like a baby. Tell him you need him to respect you more, to allow you to take control of certain decisions so that you can also feel like you are making a valuable contribution.
Monitor his progress
Ayy, you have to monitor how he treats you not all the time but give him some space to correct his behavior and when he reverts to treating you in a way that makes you freak out, give him small reminders.
Look at plan B
” Do I have to find myself a new boyfriend?” no darling, not immediately because relationships are a lot of work, and you need to exit this one without one foot in and one foot out, if he still doesn’t change well, you might have to.
What does it mean to be babied in a relationship?
Being babied in a relationship can be good and bad, on the one hand it shows love, adoration, and care but on the other, the person doing the babying can think that you cannot make decisions on your own, that you need someone to hold your hand and can sometimes be a sign of control.
Why does my boyfriend call me a little baby?
He calls you a little baby because he thinks that you need protection. You act like a baby by changing the tone of your voice and on occasion may go to him and ask him to sort certain things out for you.
In the end
Ok darlings, is being babied by your boyfriend sweet, “Yes it is” Does it show you that he loves and cares for you? ” Yes it does”, and most importantly do you need to strike a balance between acting like a baby and making your own decisions? “Yes, Yes, louder”…. tell me how it goes.