When he says you act like a man he is not talking about you growing a beard or changing your voice. He is talking about the female and male dynamics of your relationship. He might feel like he is not needed since you can do everything on your own.
Some women say “My boyfriend says I’m too masculine, does this mean he does not want me?” No, it means that he feels like his role as your boyfriend has been stripped from him, and here are the reasons why.
My Boyfriend Says I Act Like A Man (11 Reasons Why)
There can be several reasons why he says that you act like a like. You might not ask him for help and solve your problems, you might not wear any dresses or makeup or he could be saying this to get under your self and affect your self-confidence and is a red flag.
You dont let him take the lead
For whatever reason you dont trust him enough to take the lead. He might have disappointed you in the past or he is not someone who makes good decisions. He thinks you act like a man because you make the decisions without consulting him. He never has a say and since men are the ones who normally take the lead, he feels like you are too masculine.
You never wear dresses
Not to sound sexist or anything but dresses are associated with females and pants are associated with men. Now it is not to say that both sexes can’t wear any of these clothes but you get my point. He might want you to dress sexier and if you always wear pants, even on special occasions in some cases it can take your femininity away. This is not to say that only clothes make you a woman but they do play a huge part in your sexuality.
You earn more money than him
Money is the number one thing that couples fight about and is the root cause of a majority of divorces. If you earn more money than him it is his ego talking. He doesn’t feel confident because he knows that you can leave at any time. After all, financially secure women hardly tolerate nonsense.
You fix things on your own
When you have a flat tire you fix it on your own. If you see a spider you kill it on your own, and if your toilet sink breaks down you also handle it on your own. He doesn’t feel wanted and feels like his role as a man is not justified since you do everything and dont need him.
He is used to dating prissy women
We all have the type of person we are used to dating and he may have always dated women who are outwardly deemed as feminine. He is not used to dating an independent woman, he might want you to be more independent but this independence can also intimate him. Give him time to adjust.
You never put on makeup
I love make-up, especially Maybelline mascara, Revlon Colorstay foundation, and Mac cosmetics’s red lipstick but not every woman does and this is okay. You dont have to wear makeup to prove that you are not a man or that you are not too masculine. Makeup was not designed to prove our sexuality but was rather designed to enhance our features.
You only have guy friends
Having only a guy friend can also be a red flag, for one he might think you are cheating, and secondly, with only guy friends you are bound to have male mannerisms. If you have no female friends it’s safe to say that hanging around your guy friends might have made you more manly than intended and this is what your man sees.
You love watching sports
Sports has long time been something dominated by men, we see this all the time. A good example is to look at how many male sports teams have huge sponsors and how many female sports teams have sponsors, the difference is big. He might say you act like a man because you love watching sports, he needs his mind read.
He is insecure
Truthfully speaking a man who knows himself, what he wants, and is comfortable with who he is won’t be intimated by you. It doesn’t matter how masculine you are or how much you act like a man he will not feel insecure. You might not even be the problem, he is and needs to work on his self-confidence.
He wants to control you
There is nothing wrong with you, this could all be a ploy for that boyfriend of yours to get into your mind. Men know that making comments, especially about our femininity or sexuality is a good way to get under our skin. No one wants their sexual identity stripped from them. This can be his way of making you question yourself and who you are.
He is following social stereotypes
He might come from a family that has certain gender stereotypes ingrained in their minds. His mother might be what he can call a feminine woman and his father might be the one who takes the more masculine dominant role.
My Boyfriend Says I Act Like A Man (6 Things You Can Do)
Talk to him about how his words make you feel and come to a workable solution to make both of you happy. Try to put a little effort into what you wear and how you look, but only do this if you are comfortable. And if he continues with his comments and they start affecting your mental health, you can take a break from the relationship.
Try to be a little feminine
It won’t hurt to try a little here or there. Put on a little makeup and wear a dress if you feel like it. It’s the effort that counts, you can try this once, and if you dont like it leave it.
Dont change who you are
Unless he met you when you were modeling at a beauty pageant he knew the type of woman you are. He saw that you dont act like a lady, he saw that you were a bit masculine and he saw that you never wore any dresses. You do not have to change anything about yourself if you dont want to because there is nothing wrong with you.
Let him take control
Once in a while let him take the lead even if you know how to do something. Once in a while ask for his opinion on something and try his suggestions just to make him feel wanted.
Get a new boyfriend
There are men out there who dont mind or care that you dont act like a lady. Plenty of men would prefer that you act like yourself. If that means riding dirt bikes, changing car tires, or hunting in the woods then so be it.
Expand your friendship circle
Having male friends is fine but you won’t get the benefit of female giggles and companionship. You dont have to look for friends that are into makeup, fashion, or are too feminine. Look for females that enjoy the same things as you do. For example, if you like hunting you can search on Google for something like female hunting organizations.
Let him know how you feel
Before you leave at least talk to him about how this makes you feel. Tell him how uncomfortable you are when he talks about your femininity or lack thereof. Let him know how much you love and value yourself and that you are okay with being masculine.
In the end
So what if he thinks you act like a man how does he think you are supposed to act? A man who loves you will not care if you are masculine or feminine he will love you for you. Talk to him and make sure that his comments dont affect your self-esteem.