So your mom thinks you guys are friends. Your conversations with her are something along the lines of: Dearest daughter so what are we doing this weekend? Your response, I am going out with my friends. You have every right to go out with your friends, Why does your mom want to hang out with you all the time, why doesn’t she have her friends? Or even a hobby?
You don’t have to hang out with her all the time but you have to be sensitive in your approach, You don’t want Mommy dearest to think you have abandoned her, so what can you do? Have a look at surefire solutions that will get your mom to back off and have a social life.
My Mom Wants To Hang Out All The Time (8 Things To Do)
If your mom wants to hang out all the time you must try your best to let her know that you have your own life and your own friends without hurting her feelings, You also need to balance your life and make time to spend with your mom every once in a while. To maintain a good mother-daughter relationship help your mom to find social activities that will help her make friends with people who are the same age as her.
Tell her you are busy
My mom wants to see me every weekend: Ya, Tell her you are busy, it is normal to be busy I would be worried if you were not busy so tell her that you can’t hang out because you have things to do:
Something that you can say: ” Mom, I miss you but I can’t hang out with you, I have already made plans, I will let you know when we can do something together, I love you, bye”
Help her make friends
My Mom has no friends: Well the only way to get a bit of breathing room is to help your mom make friends so that she can have something to do that doesn’t involve you. Don’t make it obvious otherwise, you might make her feel like a burden. There are two things that you can do:
- When you have a birthday invite your friends and ask them to bring their moms so that your mom can have a chance to socialize.
- If that sounds awkward you can arrange a mommy day, maybe on Mother’s Day ask your friends to bring their moms to a nice picnic so that all of you can celebrate your mothers. Hopefully being around other women her age will help her make friends.
Understand that this could be worse
Do you know how many children would love to have a mom who wants to hang out and do things? Many people complain and say things like my mom never calls me, does she care about me? This is not a tactic to guilt trip you but some people will give their right leg or left kidney to have a mom who cares.
Come up with a plan
Even if you help your mom find buddies of her own she will still want to hang out, so try to suck it up and come up with a game plan. Have a day of the month dedicated to spending time with her, you don’t have to spend the whole day just a few hours having lunch will do.
The mother-daughter role should never be reversed so be kind but don’t be a pushover, Your mom is still your mom and she must not treat you like a friend or treat you like a therapist it doesn’t matter how close the relationship is.
For you to maintain that mother-daughter respect there needs to be boundaries in place. Your relationship can be very friendly and almost like BFF’s but she is still your mom. you wouldn’t want to talk about your sex life and how much you love giving your friend head. The same notion applies to hanging out, so keep those mother-daughter boundaries in place.
Approach her with kindness
Sure enough, this is irritating and can make your life miserable but approach her with kindness and don’t be rude otherwise she might think that you don’t love her and we wouldn’t want that. Don’t shout, scream, yell, and most importantly do not run away and avoid your mom, You are a big her so handle this with your big girl panties.
Encourage her to be active
My mom is bored what can she do besides hang out with me? Well if your mom has already retired she most likely doesn’t have a lot of things to do or she doesn’t know what to do with her time. If she keeps active she will have less time to bother you.
Motivate her to stay active by maybe signing up for the gym, If you want to get her to go and not stop, then go with her a few times so that she gains the momentum to keep active on her own and when you see that she is consistent let her go by herself and claim your freedom back.
Understand where she is coming from
You look at your mom with daughter eyes but have you ever sat down and thought of all the sacrifices that your mom had to make to raise you? What if she didn’t have the time to make friends because she was busy working trying to put a roof over your head and taking you from point A to point B?
When would she have gotten the time to make friends and have a social life when she had to make you a priority? You don’t owe your mom anything, but the least that you can do is try to understand why she wants to hang out with you all the time.
My Mom Wants To Hang Out All The Time: How To Help My Mom Make Friends (8 Things You Can Do To Help)
How do I encourage my mom to make friends? There are plenty of things that you can do to help your mom make friends such as: Help her join a community club, encourage her to pick up a hobby, help her to reconnect with old friends, or help her find a book club.
- Volunteer work: You can look for volunteering opportunities for her, maybe at a dog shelter or better yet an assisted living home where she will be able to connect with older citizens. She can do this once a week or twice a month.
- Help her find a hobby: If your mom loves playing bingo or crocheting there are plenty of online crocheting groups. Try searching for terms like bingo groups near me or bingo groups for the elderly. For crocheting searching for words like crocheting groups near me or knitting crocheting groups should help you find results.
- Bumble BFF: There are a few older citizens on Bumble BFF, make sure that she chooses the friendship option and monitor who she interacts with until she sees them in person, and when the time comes go with her to meet her new friends.
- Kindergarten assistant: There are plenty of kindergartens that are looking for assistants, especially from older women, if your mom is not working she can try to find a center and help out.
- Library: The library is the perfect place for your mom to find something to do, she can either spend time reading or try and get a part-time job as a library assistant.
- Reconnect with old friends: Your mom might have lost touch with some of her old friends. There is nothing wrong with using Facebook to find her old buddies. I am sure they would love to reconnect and are probably in the same position that she is in.
- Book clubs for the middle-aged: Your mom will have a great time over here, book clubs for middle-aged women are always a hoot, you can help her find one online or offline.
- Social clubs: Google will help you find social clubs in your area for example if you type” social clubs or community centers for over 50’s in Kansas” you should be able to find some clubs that arrange lunches or teas, remember to go with her.
To wrap it up, Darling
My mom has no friends or hobbies what should I do? Darling we have given you surefire solutions now the onus is on you to help your mom be more social, take your time, she is not going to back off immediately so give her the space to get comfortable with the idea of not always hanging out with you, Good luck.