So you watched a lot of chick flick movies where the characters went to college and when they arrived they instantly made a lot of friends, went to parties, had boyfriends, and had a blast. So off to college, you went, thinking that you were also going to get there meet a group of nice girls your age, and make friends. But no, that’s not you, your days are spent wandering around the college campus looking at other people laughing and having a good time with their friends, but where are yours? Why haven’t you made friends yet?
Okay, the introduction was a little dramatic but it’s what happens in real life, a lot of sophomores are struggling to make friends. But what can you do? Don’t throw in the towel, have a look at some of the ways that you can overcome not making friends in college and spend the remainder of your college years being a socialite.
Why do I have no friends in college?
You don’t have friends in college because you need to learn how to adjust to your newfound independence, and this means you need to meet new people you can do this by joining college activities so that you can make friends.
7 things that you can do when you do not have any friends in college
Let go of the fantasy
Now that you know that this is not a Lindsay Lohan movie where you arrive in school ( your case college) and the popular students take you under the wings, you can start to see the situation for what it is. The truth is that you won’t instantly make friends, you won’t immediately be invited to parties and you won’t immediately have a bunch of girlfriends that you can call your sister for life. Letting go of the fantasy is a good thing because you get out of your own way and work on having a social life, and this includes immersing yourself in practical ways to make friends.
Know that you are not the only one
Did you know that according to data over 17 million students alone were registered for college? So you can bet that not every one of those 17 million students is having the time of their lives, going to parties and club hopping. Many sophomores report having a hard time integrating into college life, many of them highlight the struggle of adapting to living on their own, but hundreds of thousand say they have not made any friends at all, you see you are not the only one, does that make you feel a little better?
Pro tip: In the meantime why not get in touch with your old friends from school, if you don’t have friends from high school, take this as an opportunity to make friends.
Attend off-campus events
Maybe you are narrowing your search too much because sometimes you might make friends outside and not inside your college. There are many off-campus events that you can attend, most college towns have venues, clubs, and activities that have a lot of young people but are not part of the college or university.
Don’t be afraid to look at what interests you, you can look at activities such as group swimming, bowling, or a book club. You can focus on meeting people outside your campus and who knows you might meet someone who will be your best friend for life.
Don’t be afraid to ask for help
Your college professors have been where you are and have most likely met hundreds of thousands of students who have been in your position, they should be your first point of contact. I have never met a college professor who has not keen on helping any student make friends. I am sure that you have a professor who seems to be in the know and easy to talk to, trust me they will help you so don’t be afraid to speak up.
If speaking to your professor seems intimidating then find a job on campus, most campuses have student centers where everyone hangs out in their free time.
Look for a roommate
Now, this depends on the setup of your college dorms. Sometimes the campus is so small that every student has their room, and maybe you have your apartment. If that is the case then try getting a roommate, someone your age or stay at shared accommodation, that’s the perfect way to meet friends.
This should be your last option, I want you to prove to yourself that you can make friends and that you can live on your own. But sometimes the campus that you choose is not a good fit for you. I once had a friend who transferred from another campus to the campus I was at, when she told me her story she said that she felt like she was floating around at her previous campus, and no matter how hard she tried she didn’t fit in. But as soon as she came to the campus I was in, she made friends not only with just me but a bunch of other people, so sometimes the issue is not with you but the campus that you are in.
And sometimes it’s not even the campus that you are in that is the issue but the town, small towns tend to have fewer people going to college, most students want to explore big cities after high school, think
Look for volunteering opportunities
This is a win-win situation, volunteering will not only get you socializing but it will also look good on your resume, many colleges have opportunities to volunteer, and find something that has a lot of people. Avoid volunteering opportunities such as admin or care work because those tend to have minimal contact with other people, Don’t forget to balance your school work with volunteering so that you won’t fail a semester.
Is it normal to have no friends in college?
Yes, it’s completely normal to feel lonely in college, especially if it’s the first time away from home. Learning to adjust to your new-found freedom can be challenging, and many students struggle to make friends.
Is it normal to be lonely in college?
Yes, it is normal to feel lonely in college especially if none of your friends from high school are attending the same college as you. You can combat the lonely feeling and meet new people by joining a few college clubs, trying to volunteer, or getting a part-time job on campus.
I know it is easy to want to run back to high school because maybe you had a lot of friends, but college is a time to discover yourself and that means figuring out how to form new adult friendships, this means stepping out of your comfort zone and easing into college social activities one step at a time.